I feel our first draft is a huge success, firstly we managed to counteract problems that we experienced with our preliminary, such as not filming enough footage, continuity errors and irregular lighting.
The argument at the very start of the video works really well with the drum beat, but needs to be a lot smoother and maybe the final part would be them moving away from each other so the audience knows that they have split up. Me and Maz have argued whether this opening argument should be in black and white and i feel to test this is black and white would make a rightful judgement. I think the use of a white screen on the second layer of the video works exceptionally well to symbolise a new day. When Joe wakes up i feel this is really well edited by us both. The only thing which could be changed is the length of the clip when Joe is walking towards the camera as he comes into focus as he walks past, as the clip is now shortened it just seems that the clip is out of focus and suggesting that this is a general mistake. Another point is at 0:30 Joe walks down the stairs and a clothes rail is clearly in view which doesn't match with any of the mise en scene, this can easily be resolved by shortening the width of the shot and focusing more on Joe by having the width of the stairs level with the shot. Other than that I feel this part is near perfection.
When the band are performing the lighting changes drastically due to the location of the camera, by changes the brightness and tones of each clip the performance would look more clean cut and proffesionally shot. Georgys parts need to be edited to the same degree as Joe's part, as there is clear differences. I feel as the band has been introduced in the first chorus, we can possibly place clips of the band between Georgy's clips but this would need to be tried and tested first. Also the clip where Georgy walks into the shot is needed as the audience is confused why she is now there. Another point is that the clip with the harmonica is too long and needs to be broken down with more close ups and drum beats.
I especially like the three seconds of relaxed atmosphere at the end of the video, it has a sense of relaxation and confirms the peace after the confrontation at the start of the video. This is common in live performance videos and this style fits perfectly with the nature of the song.
Points to improve on our first draft are:
Going through the live band footage in precise detail
Match up lyrics to mouth movements perfectly
Change around the length of clips for both Georgys and Joes part.
We might need to film a party scene as some of the clips are very dragged out
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